Homemaker? Me?

I have been a “housewife” or “homemaker” for a long while now, about 9 years altogether or thereabouts. Before this, I was a successful career woman (my hubster was a full time stay at home Dad) but my health took a turn for the worse and my hubster and I swapped places. I thought it would be easy peasy! Man, I was wrong about that one….

When you hear the words “housewife” or “homemaker” what comes to mind?

The first thing that pops into my head is the classic stereotype of the 1950s super woman; immaculately dressed and made up, perfect house and kids, husband’s slippers warming by the fire for his return from a busy day at work. Haha! I once challenged myself to keep a 1950s housewife schedule for a month – it was beyond hard-core! I have so much respect for my Grandmother’s generation. Those ladies were tough, frugal and fierce matriarchs!

The next thing that comes to mind is Pinterest bloggers….. I know, what does that have to do with home making? Well, I love Pinterest. I have about a million pins, on hundreds of boards and can get lost on there for hours! It’s impossible to avoid the bloggers though. The ones with sparkling clean homes (in their amazingly staged photos) who only clean with expensive essential oils and have amazingly well behaved kids who don’t eat any refined sugar, gluten, dairy, or grains. Know what I’m talking about? The ones with perfect hair and make up, smiling joyfully in the awesome pictures with their super slim bods in their on trend clothes. Yeah. Them.

Both of these ideas of home-making have a common thread; they are completely unrealistic and unachievable! And both of them, for the longest time, made me feel like crap. True story – because I don’t clean my home with several Β£40 bottles of essential oils, because my hair is never perfect and I wear make up about 4 times a year, because my kids eat dairy, gluten, refined sugar, grains and whatever else….. I felt like crap. Like a failure. Like a bad Mum and a bad Wife and the worst housewife that ever lived.

Anyone else feel like that?

But you know what I figured out dear reader? It’s not true! I am not the worst Mum, Wife and Housewife in the world; I do my best every single day, I love my kids and husband and they know it, and I love my little house too.

My home is just that – HOME. And I made it, with my hubster and kids; so therefore I am a homemaker! It may not be immaculately clean and fragrant, but it’s a welcoming space and people enjoy coming to visit here. We eat food that’s freshly prepared with love, and yes it contains the dreaded stuff BUT IT’S DELICIOUS. Our friends and family often comment on how much they love being in our home, and we regularly have to tuck a blanket over visitors that have decided to take a nap on the couch!

Once I started to look at my home in this way, seeing all the good things about it instead of focusing on the “negatives” it really changed everything for me. Not just with homemaking; looking for the positives in every situation has helped me so much in so many areas of life.

And I don’t mean positive thinking that blindly ignores problems – that’s called delusion – I mean acknowledging the tough stuff but finding the good in it too. That’s the ticket!

Home is what you make it. I want mine to be full of laughter and peace, freedom to kick your shoes off and put your feet up, where you can get a good dinner and a bucket full of encouragement.

What kind of home do you want to make?

Much love x

Autumn feels from the Valley.

Yesterday was a busy day! We had loads of stuff to catch up on at home and a home education project to do with our son. Then my lovely hubster had a two hour driving lesson.

Busy busy busy.

At 4pm, my son and I set off to the local park. He wanted to try out his new boomerang gizmo and I just needed to get out of the house! We met the hubster there; and while the boys threw the frisbee thing around on the field I sat on a bench and just…..

Looked.

Breathed.

Marvelled.

The colours of Autumn are all starting to show off! It has been about a week since I last made it to the park and the difference is striking. Now the lush greens are turning into oranges, yellows and reds.

It looks like the treetops are on fire!

I love the Autumn. Not because of all the stereotypical reasons (think pumpkins, halloween, PSL – have you even had a Pumpkin Spice Latte? Tastes like vomit in my opinion) but for the feeling of settling down, slowing down into the quiet rhythms of winter.

Autumn is the time for my favourite festival of the year, Bonfire Night! In the UK on the 5th of November the skies are lit by huge fires and massive displays of fireworks. We stand around wrapped in our scarves and woolly hats, gobbling pie and peas and parkin, waving sparklers and having a great time.

I LOVE Bonfire Night!

Bonfire Night is celebrated more as a tradition now. Originally it began as a way to remember the failed attempt Guy Fawkes and his companions made to blow up the Houses Of Parliament in 1605, and the consequences of their actions. That’s why on some Bonfires you will see a “Guy”- a roughly human shaped doll that is parked on top of the pyre.

Interestingly, it seems that a lot of people celebrate that Guy Fawkes tried to destroy Parliament, rather than celebrating his failure!

Not sure what that says about the political climate in the UK.

I love Autumn for the darker mornings and evenings, the warming food and for the days of blinding sunshine and crisp cold blue skies.

I am not a huge fan of the driving rain, dropping temperatures or fog. But it can’t all be picture perfect I suppose!

What about you, when is your favourite time of year? Do you enjoy Autumn, or maybe you’re a Spring kinda person?

Much love xx

An alternative kind of lifestyle?

I am not a lifestyle guru. There, I said it.

I blunder through life day to day, hoping for the best and trying to get by; winging it is the most accurate descriptor for my parenting and homemaking style!

I am trying to live lightly – to generate less rubbish and do more good to the planet than harm. I am trying to live kindly – to heal my body and mind and be free of stress and anxiety. I am trying to live free – to raise my kids with freedom and confidence and have a bit of it myself!

I first had the wacky idea of writing a lifestyle blog whilst picking nettles in my pyjamas, at 5am, wearing crocs, and looking less than sane. I mean, who wouldn’t want to know how to be as fabulous as me? Obviously I dismissed it. But its been like a midgie buzzing in my ear ever since.

Or maybe a midgie actually got trapped in my ear and I should probably get it checked out?!?

I don’t know what you can expect from me. Probably not super slick blog posts. Probably not anything other than the ramblings of a dippy hippy woman from rural Yorkshire.

You will probably not find the answers to the biggest questions in life here! Or maybe you will, but it won’t be a faddy product you can buy to fix everything or a magic pill to take. I am not into that kind of thing.

However; if it’s honesty, humour (I think I am hilarious), helpful ideas, maybe the odd craft project/recipe, even the occasional product review of stuff I buy and use……. well you are definitely in the right place!

Oh and expect lots of photos of the gorgeous place I am lucky enough to live in! And my beautiful husband. Maybe the cats and puppy too….. and the kids…. basically lots of photos.

So that’s it, my first post done and dusted! If you would like to, please comment and let me know what kind of things you are interested in and what wafflings I can write for you in future – it would be a huge help!

Much love,

Dee x